Matchday 8: Jahn Regensburg – FC Sankt Pauli 3-0…

Posted: September 29, 2012 by Zouz in Zweite Liga 2012-13
Tags: , , , , ,

Unspeakable Horror!!!

“Look at them! They’re wearing FCSP t-shirts…but they’re looking weird…the way they move, the way they look… must be at least eleven of them and they are coming our way… wait a minute! These guys are not the FCSP squad – they actually look DEAD… and THEY’RE COMING FOR US!!! OH MY GOD!!! NOOOOO! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!”(chomp sounds follow…)


Schubert’s sacking on Wednesday morning had already brought an air of optimism among the Scum personnel so as soon as we grabbed our seats with Brother “Tinplate” St. John after making for a second consecutive week the “trip” towards Northern suburbs (FUCK OTE TV!), everything seemed that somehow is going to be OK… Of course, OK didn’t mean victory only, but a good performance by the boys,  something that usually happens after a trainer going away regardless if this happened for good or bad (GOOD in our case, we’ll get to this later). Our opponent Jahn Regensburg wasn’t looking like a terrifying one, a little of this, a little of that, FCSP fans making impressive presence inside, you don’t need much to get excited when you’re following FCSP 🙂

Match started and, as soon as the clock hit 9th minute, we automatically felt more comfortable, after passing the first 8 dangerous (this season) minutes. The Art of Scum prediction… Seconds later, a Jahn Regensburg goal (Sembolo) gets (correctly – Kamavuaka offside) called off… we changed a few colors until we find-out that the goal does not actually count and suck happily some  more beer 🙂 When actually, we had a goal of our own called off (again correct decision – Thorandt interfered from offside position as well) on 16′, hope started turning to strong belief! Poor, Clueless Scum… Our hosts (that seems that they weren’t giving a shit about our victory certainty) put quickly things back in order… After giving the first warning, wasting a good counter attack on 20′, they easily got the lead with Sembolo (left flank) on 24′ after a conter attack exact copy of the previous one… Instead of saying the usual staff about Defensive Circus, etc, this time we’ll do something different: please watch these 2 occasions at the match highlights and PLEASE CHECK Jahn Regensburg’s No 39 (Djuricin) ALL ALONE at the right flank both times… Almost a situation from zero on 28′ when a 35m shot from Müller somehow confused Tschauner who managed to handle the situation though, even with his left leg… ClASSY action for FCSP on 38′ (weren’t so many of them) with Saglik, collecting an excellent assist from Funk, avoiding his opponent but missing the final hit with the ball ending up in Hofmann’s hands… Of course all these things lost their sense 6′ later, when our hosts after another one smooth-as-in-training counter attack executed us – Müller the scorer, getting the rebound after Tschauner’s initial save. At this point, even we knew that it was all over…

The second… (source:

Second half was simply TRAGIC… Jahn Regensburg “secured” the game with another Sembolo blitzkrieg counter attack goal and then…shut off the engines…If this happened due to respect towards FCSP or in order to preserve useful resources is a question that the Scum just can’t answer… One thing is sure: the last 30 minutes should be considered one the biggest football tortures I’ve personally experience during the past 5 years, second only to the infamous second half vs Bayern München a few years ago…Yeah, we had 15 minutes of some kind of action with a few situations with Saglik (he tried hard once more…). A great free kick on 65′ (excellent save by Hofmann on it’s right corner), a header over the crossbar on 73′ and an unlucky shot from within the penalty area on 76’…There was even a Kringe shot succesfuly challenged by Hofmann on 79’… but all these against… Jahn Regensburg sitting comfortably backwards and actually not looking very passionate to go for more…this is FUCKING HUMILIATING… Our hosts almost reached the 4th though, with a header on the crossbar after a corner kick (pretty familiar, right?) by Kotzke on 82’… Nothing more – final Score 3-0…

The usual face-down picture. This time, seriously considered leaving on last week’s one who looked almost exactly like the one 2 weeks ago 🙂 (source:

THE BAD NEWS: Last week, we discussed about an FCSP squad on the second half  “looking like a dead person cardiogram until the closing 10 minutes”. If this statement has even a small amount of truth inside, then you can easily understand the post header 🙂 The actual outcome, is anything but funny though…tomorrow afternoon will find us probably on 15th place, just one step over the relegation zone…

THE GOOD NEWS: We heard a lot of people arguing that this was a bad timing sacking Andre Schubert since this was his team and a) he deserved some more time to show results and b) his departure will cause even more problems to the squad. This is a well respected opinion and especially the second leg seemed to be an actual point watching yesterday’s game BUT we disagree 100%… Our (not mine) opinion is that this guy should be fired even back from May for reasons that we have already explained in full detail – a look at our posts since last May is self explanatory. His “termination” even if the timing is not good, should happen. Forget Scum’s “ethical” arguments – last month, has been obvious to anybody, that even “technically speaking” (at the level that fans are allowed to do that) there was no future for FCSP under Schubert’s command, hence the sooner the better. Promotion seems already out of the question and if theoretically possible, still impossible with Schubert, so instead of loosing another season (and another summer probably) is a good chance to start building early instead of just cheering for securing Liga 2, next May…probably Winter break would be a better timing, but too much time has been lost already. In a few words, FCSP first steps without AS should be considered GOOD news one way or another – if they will be proven such, depends on what’s on the minds of the people who sacked him in the first place – after all, don’t forget: the problem was never only AS itself…

Next Friday (third consecutive actually!) the friendly and respected club of FC Union Berlin is paying us a visit. This means seven days, much better than the 48 hours that Thomas MeggleTimo Schultz and Mathias Hain had on Wednesday. These guys ain’t magicians for sure but they are FCSP lads involved with the team for years. They will try their best, the fans (impressive once more yesterday!) will stand behind, the squad hopefully will follow, what the hell, something’s gotta give 🙂

Match goals:

1:0 Sembolo (24′, Right shot, Assist: Hein)

2:0 J.-P. Müller (44′, Left shot, Assist: Hein)

 3:0 Sembolo (55′, Leftt shot, Assist: Kotzke)

 Spectators: 10500

Sankt Pauli cards: Daube, Bartels, MohrThorandt

For full match coverage (in German) visit:


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